We all want to change something in our lives—maybe it's ending an addiction, leaving a toxic relationship, starting a workout routine, or just showing up for ourselves more consistently. Motivation is powerful… but motivation alone isn’t always enough to get you where you want to go. The truth is, motivation can come and go. It’s consistency and the support to stay consistent that truly makes the difference.

So how do we get from “I want to change” to actually following through? That’s where Motivational Interviewing comes in.

What Is Motivational Interviewing?

Motivational Interviewing (MI) is a compassionate, client-centered counseling approach designed to help people explore their own reasons for change. It’s especially helpful when someone feels stuck in indecision or doesn’t quite know how to start moving forward.

This method gently guides you through the mental and emotional process of change by helping you identify why the change matters to you and how to take real steps toward making it happen. At A New Start Counseling, our therapists use Motivational Interviewing to help clients gain clarity, shift ambivalence, and feel empowered to make lasting changes in their lives.

When Life Starts Again....

After the death of someone close, the world may feel unrecognizable to a grieving child. Normal schedules, school, and social environments might feel heavy or overwhelming. Yet carefully reintroducing routine—school, activities, the community—can serve as a gentle reminder that life continues, while holding space for their grief.

Routine doesn’t erase pain. Instead, it offers familiar building blocks: predictability, purpose, and social connection. These are powerful anchors during a storm of sorrow.

Easing Into School or Childcare

The return to school—or any group setting—can bring fear and uncertainty. It often helps when caregivers:

• Speak with teachers or counselors ahead of time, so they understand the child’s emotional landscape.

• Plan for a soft start: allow the child to arrive a bit later, shorten the day, or bring a comfort item if needed.

• Encourage check-ins: brief moments of connection during the day—snack time, a hug, a note—can help the child feel grounded and supported.

Feeling Anxious? Here’s What to Tell Yourself — And How Therapy Can Help

Anxiety has a way of sneaking up on us. Sometimes it’s a racing heart, a restless mind, or a tightness in your chest that won’t seem to go away. Maybe your thoughts are filled with “what ifs,” or you’re constantly trying to plan for every possible outcome. Sound familiar?

First things first: take a deep breath. You are not alone. Anxiety is something many people experience and the good news is that there are ways to manage it, cope with it, and live a full life even with those feelings present.

At A New Start Counseling, we specialize in virtual counseling for anxiety, emotional wellness, and stress management. Whether you're experiencing anxious thoughts for the first time or you've been managing them for years, our licensed and compassionate therapists are here to support you from wherever you are — all through the comfort of online sessions across Texas.

10 Empowering Things to Say to Yourself When You're Feeling Anxious

When anxiety hits, having the right words can shift your mindset and calm your nervous system. Try saying these out loud or writing them down. Each is designed to help you ground yourself and reconnect with the present moment.

When Your World Has Changed Too

Grieving a loss while caring for a child can feel deeply overwhelming—like walking a tightrope between your own pain and the need to stay emotionally available. Yet your healing matters not only for you but also for the child who looks to you for safety, comfort, and emotional guidance.

Supporting yourself through grief is not selfish — it’s essential. When you care for your own emotional health, you model healthy coping and create a steadier foundation from which you and your child can both heal.

Acknowledge Your Own Grief

Whether it's a parent, partner, friend, or pet you’ve lost, your grief is valid and deserves attention. Giving yourself permission to feel doesn’t diminish your caregiving role, it enhances it. Name your emotions: sadness, sorrow, confusion, or even relief. Sharing with a trusted friend, support group, or therapist can lighten an emotional load that’s too heavy to carry alone.

Find Moments of Self-Compassion

Grief has no timeline—some days might feel manageable, and others overwhelming. Choose small rituals that gently nurture your spirit:

The Courage to Let Go

Life teaches us many lessons, and one of the most important is learning when and how to let go. It’s never easy to walk away from something you’ve invested so much time, energy, and hope into. Whether that’s a relationship, a job, a belief, or even a part of yourself. Letting go doesn’t mean you are weak or that you’ve lost. In fact, it can be one of the bravest and most powerful choices you make. When you decide to let go, you’re choosing to stop fighting for something that no longer serves your peace or growth. You’re choosing to start fresh, to rebuild from the ground up, and to prioritize your own emotional and mental well-being. That is true courage.

The Freedom in Releasing the Need to Be Right

Many of us hold tightly to the need to always be right or to have everything figured out, and this can keep us stuck in cycles of frustration and pain. But letting go of that need can be incredibly liberating. It’s okay to still be learning and growing. You don’t have to have all the answers today. Therapy offers a safe space where you can explore these feelings, learn to shift your perspective, and release old patterns that no longer serve you. Together, we can help you reconnect with your dreams, values, and sense of personal power.

When a child loses someone they love, they may feel left out of the grieving process—especially when traditional funerals or memorials are geared toward adults. But including children in memorial rituals can help them feel connected, comforted, and validated in their grief.

Memorial activities designed for kids offer tangible ways to process loss, keep memories alive, and make sense of a confusing experience. These child-friendly rituals can take place at a formal service, at home, or even virtually, and they allow children to say goodbye in ways that are emotionally appropriate and meaningful.

Why Memorials Matter for Grieving Children

Memorials give children something concrete to hold onto during a time of emotional uncertainty. While they may not fully grasp the finality of death, they can still understand the importance of honoring someone they love. Whether it's planting a tree, making a memory box, or lighting a candle, these acts provide structure and symbolism that help children express grief, remember the person who died, and feel supported by those around them.

Meaningful Ways to Involve Children in MemorialsMemory Box or Memory Jar

Be kind to your mind. It works hard for you every day and it deserves rest. If you're constantly on the go, always checking the next thing off your list, and feeling like you’re only valuable when you're achieving… we want to talk with you.

At A New Start Counseling, we see you. You might look calm and successful on the outside, but inside, you’re exhausted.

You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. You may just be stuck in survival mode. And we’re here to help.

When Busyness Becomes a Way to Cope

For many high-achieving professionals, entrepreneurs, caregivers, and academics, being busy becomes a lifestyle. Sometimes, it’s not just ambition, it’s a trauma response.

If you’ve experienced emotional pain, loss, or trauma in the past, staying busy might be your way of coping. It can become a way to avoid stillness, where emotions might rise to the surface. We call this "functional avoidance” or a trauma response and while it may have served you once, it might now be keeping you disconnected, exhausted, and numb.

Why Constant Busyness Can Be a Trauma Response

When a child experiences the death of someone close to them, it can be hard for them to put feelings into words. Instead, grief often shows up through behavior—clinginess, anger, withdrawal, or even moments of laughter. That’s why grief activities designed for children can be so powerful. They offer a safe, developmentally appropriate way for children to process emotions, express what they’re feeling, and begin to heal.

Whether the loss involves a parent, grandparent, sibling, or pet, these activities help children externalize emotions, develop emotional literacy, and maintain a meaningful connection to the person who died.

Creative Expression Activities

Drawing and Art-Making

Children may find it easier to show what they feel rather than say it. Invite them to: Draw what they miss about the person, Illustrate a favorite memory, Create a "grief creature" or give their feelings a color or shape. For some children, adding labels, names, or speech bubbles can help give voice to their emotions.

Journaling and Letter Writing

Older children may enjoy: Writing goodbye letters, Keeping a grief journal, Recording dreams or daily thoughts about the person who died

Do these words feel far away right now? Love. Joy. Abundance. Gratitude. They’re powerful. They’re healing. They’re real. And they’re not just for other people. They’re meant for you, too.

When you’ve been in relationships, jobs, or life situations that drain you instead of filling you, those feelings can begin to fade. You might start to feel numb, bitter, or lost — like you’re stuck in something you can’t quite name, but it weighs on you every day.

At A New Start Counseling, we want to help you reconnect with what makes your life yours — full, vibrant, and meaningful.

When the Light Feels Far Away

We sometimes stay in environments or relationships long after we’ve lost the things that once made them feel safe or fulfilling. And over time, those situations can take a toll — leaving us feeling: Depressed, Lonely, Resentful, Angry, Jealous, Emotionally stuck or burned out

Sometimes, we stay because we’ve invested so much. So much time, energy, love, hope. Letting go feels like failure. But in truth, staying where you’re hurting is not loyalty and it’s not strength. It’s self-neglect and it can be harmful.

When a child experiences the loss of someone they love, participating in memorial rituals can bring comfort, connection, and a sense of clarity. However, traditional funerals aren’t always designed with children in mind—leaving them unsure of how to be involved or how to process what’s happening. That’s where child-friendly memorial ideas come in. These thoughtful, age-appropriate activities help bridge that gap, giving children ways to express their grief, stay connected to the person they lost, and begin to heal. Tools like The Terrible, Super Sad Day by Vanessa Valles, LCSW-S, can support these moments by providing language, emotional validation, and an opportunity to open the door to difficult—but necessary—conversations. Through ritual, remembrance, and storytelling, we help children understand that their feelings matter and their memories are worth holding onto.

How to Involve a Child in a Funeral or Memorial

Inclusion fosters understanding. Whether attending in person or virtually, here are safe and age-appropriate ways to involve a child:

• Let them choose a photo or drawing to place near the casket or altar

• Give them a small job (handing out programs, placing flowers)

  more

It’s a beautiful thing to have people in your life who care about you, who cheer you on and want to see you thrive. However, sometimes, even with the best intentions, those same people may push their own expectations, opinions, or dreams onto you.

And that can feel… confusing.

At A New Start Counseling, we want you to know: you don’t have to live someone else’s version of your life. Your dreams, your boundaries, and your voice matter — and we’re here to help you learn how to honor them.

Learning to Tell the Difference Between Red Flags and Green Flags

Sometimes in relationships; whether with family, friends, or romantic partners; it can be hard to know what’s healthy and what’s not. Especially if you were raised in environments where red flags were normalized, or green flags were unfamiliar.

In therapy, we’ll help you:

• Recognize red flags that signal emotional harm, manipulation, or control

• Understand green flags that show safety, support, and mutual respect

• Learn how to set boundaries that protect your well-being

  more

When a child experiences the loss of a loved one, they’re not just grieving the person they are grieving changes to their world, their routine, and their sense of safety.

Grief is overwhelming for anyone. But for children, who often don’t yet have the language or life experience to make sense of their emotions, hands-on, creative, and therapeutic activities can be powerful tools for healing.

Below are several grief activities for children that promote emotional expression, connection, and long-term resilience. Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or therapist, these approaches are designed to help children remember, express, and feel safe while navigating the pain of loss.

Why Grief Activities Help Kids Heal

Children process grief differently than adults. They may swing between crying one moment and playing the next. They may ask the same questions repeatedly, or seem unaffected only to have a sudden outburst weeks later. As kids don’t always express grief in words, creative expression and movement-based activities become essential tools. These activities help children: Understand what has happened, Explore their feelings safely, Stay connected to the loved one, Regain a sense of routine and security. These aren’t just distractions they are therapeutic activities after loss that help children move through grief, not around it.

If you’ve been feeling lost, stuck, or overwhelmed, you’re not alone and you don’t need anyone else’s permission to begin again.

At A New Start Counseling, we believe that healing begins when you say yes to yourself. Whether you're trying to find clarity, rebuild your confidence, or simply catch your breath, we’re here to help you find your vision, your voice, and your way forward.

Strength-Based Therapy to Help You Move Through the Weeds

Life has a way of piling up. Stress, self-doubt, burnout, anxiety and before we know it, we can feel buried beneath it all. But even when you feel stuck in the weeds, your strengths are still there, waiting to be rediscovered.

Using positive psychology and strength-based counseling, we help you identify what’s already strong in you — your values, your resilience, your dreams — and use those as a foundation to grow from.

Because you are not broken. You’re becoming.

Virtual Therapy from Anywhere in Texas — Comfort, Clarity, and Growth

Whether you're navigating life transitions, feeling disconnected from your purpose, or just need a space to reflect, online therapy makes support more accessible than ever. From the comfort of your home, you can work with a licensed therapist who will help you:

Isabella is a young girl whose family has a traumatic event happen. Isabella struggles to feel better on her own after the loss and trauma. Her parents take her to meet with a mental health counselor, Ms. Vanessa, to work on regaining a sense of mental wellness. Isabella participates in sessions and learns different skills to help her feel better.

“The terrible , super sad day” is a heartfelt and inspiring story of resilience and recovery. After a traumatic event shakes her world, young Isabella is left struggling to cope with the weight of loss and emotional pain. Unable to feel better on her own, her parents take her to see Ms. Vanessa, a compassionate mental health counselor, who helps Isabella navigate the storm of her emotions.

Through thoughtful therapy sessions, Isabella learns practical coping skills, emotional resilience, and the importance of mental wellness. As she works through her grief and begins to regain a sense of inner strength, Isabella discovers that healing is a journey—one filled with challenges, but also with hope and transformation.

This powerful book not only explores the emotional struggles that many children face after a traumatic event but also offers a positive message of recovery and self-empowerment. Perfect for young readers and families seeking to understand mental health, "Isabella's Journey" is a touching reminder that, no matter how difficult the road may seem, healing is possible with support, courage, and the right tools.

When I first started in my field a mother came into my office with her four year old son. Her own mother had just died after a long illness, and she was struggling with how to get him to understand she had died. She looked at me and said, “I told him Grammy went to sleep and is not coming back and now he’s terrified of bedtime.” She meant well. We all do. However, when it comes to explaining death to children, the words we choose matter a lot.

As adults, we are often tempted to soften the blow with phrases like “passed away,” “gone to a better place,” or “went to sleep.” These expressions may feel gentle to us, but for young minds still learning how the world works, they can create confusion, fear, and misunderstanding. So today, I want to talk honestly and gently about what words to use when explaining death to kids and how to do it in a way that’s clear, kind, and developmentally appropriate.

Be Direct: Use the Words “Died” and “Dead” Children need clarity not metaphors.

Say: “Grandpa died. That means his body stopped working and he isn’t alive anymore.”

Avoid: “Grandpa passed,” “He went to sleep,” or “He’s in a better place.”

These phrases, while well-meaning, can lead to fear of sleeping, worry that someone else will “go away,” or a belief that death is temporary.

Trying something new? Whether it's starting a job, going to a social event, or simply stepping outside of your routine can make anxiety show up fast.

If you've ever felt your heart race, your stomach tighten, or your mind fill with "what ifs" in unfamiliar situations, you're not alone. At A New Start Counseling, we want you to know that this is a normal response, and we’re here to help you navigate it with care and confidence.

Anxiety Is a Natural Response — But It Doesn’t Have to Take Over

Anxiety is your body’s way of saying, “This is new. I’m checking it out to make sure we’re safe.” It’s part of your internal safety system, designed to help you respond to change or uncertainty.

The good news? Once your brain and body recognize that the new experience is safe, the anxiety begins to fade — and with time and practice, those situations become easier.

How Therapy Helps You Build Confidence in New Situations

One of the most effective tools we use in therapy is graded exposure — a gentle, step-by-step process where we gradually help you face the things that cause anxiety, starting small and building at a pace that feels manageable.

I remember a father once sitting across from me in the therapy room, nervously wringing his hands. His daughter had just lost her grandmother, the woman who baked cookies every Sunday, who took her to church and who tucked her in when he had to work late. Now she was gone. “She keeps asking when Grandma is coming back,” he whispered, eyes wide with worry. “What do I say? I don’t want to scare her.” It’s a question I’ve been asked more times than I can count.

How do you explain death to a child?

The truth is, it’s never easy. But it’s incredibly important. Children deserve honest, loving guidance to help them understand what death means because if we don’t help them make sense of it, their minds will try to fill in the blanks on their own, often in ways that are scarier or more confusing than the truth.

So let’s talk about how to do this gently, clearly, and with the compassion your child needs.

Be Honest and Direct

Children need concrete explanations. Use words like “dead” and “died,” even if they feel uncomfortable at first. Avoid euphemisms like “passed away,” “went to sleep,” or “gone to a better place.” While well-intentioned, these phrases can confuse or frighten children—especially younger ones who take language literally.

When we’re depressed, it’s common to pull back from the people, places, and activities that once brought us joy. We stop texting back. We cancel plans. We lose motivation for things we used to love — and over time, life can start to feel smaller, lonelier, and harder to re-engage with.

At A New Start Counseling, we want you to know: you don’t have to stay stuck, and we’re here to help.

Depression Can Shift — And So Can You

Depression often tells us to shut down. It convinces us that we don’t have the energy, that we won’t enjoy it anyway, or that we just need to lie low until we feel “better.” But the truth is, waiting to feel motivated before engaging in life again can keep us in the cycle of depression. That’s where behavioral activation can make a powerful difference.

What Is Behavioral Activation?

Behavioral activation is a therapy-based approach that helps people slowly and intentionally reintroduce meaningful activities back into their lives. These activities don’t have to be big or overwhelming — they might be as simple as taking a short walk, calling a friend, playing music, or watering a plant. The goal is to gently reconnect with the parts of life that depression has pulled you away from — step by step, and at your own pace.

I’ll never forget the day they walked into my office—a quiet, wide-eyed six-year-old, barely clinging to the edges of their world after losing a parent. It was their first time in therapy.
They didn’t know what to say. Honestly, they didn’t say much at all. Their little body seemed to carry the full weight of their loss, and the silence between us was heavy. They weren’t just mourning the death of a parent. They were mourning the loss of everything that once made life feel safe. Their world had been rearranged overnight: A new home. A new bed. A new school, a new routine, a new person making their breakfast. Even the snacks were different.

That’s the thing about grief; especially for children; It doesn’t just take a loved one. It steals familiarity. It rewrites the rules of everyday life, and it can leave a child feeling completely untethered. In those early sessions, this little one hardly spoke. They were shut down, not because they didn’t care but because they didn’t know how to start. The grief had frozen their voice and their life. It took months of slow, steady work. Social stories, daily routines, gentle praise, and a whole lot of patience. We had to build a bridge between their old life and this new, unfamiliar world.

Depression can be difficult. It doesn’t always look the same, and it certainly doesn’t feel the same for everyone. Some days, it may feel like a fog you can’t shake. Other days, it might show up as irritability, exhaustion, or even disconnection from people and things you once loved. What can be even more confusing is not always knowing why you feel this way.

If this sounds familiar, please know you’re not alone.

As a licensed mental health clinician, we work with many individuals who are navigating the ups and downs of depression. One important thing to remember is this: your depression can shift. The way you’re feeling now is not how you’ll feel forever and support is available, even from the comfort of your own home.

Why Am I Feeling This Way?

Depression often leads us into different emotional states. One day you might feel sad and hopeless; another day you might feel numb or unusually angry. It’s common to feel confused or stuck, wondering, “Why am I like this?” That’s where therapy can be incredibly helpful.

Working with a therapist can help you explore your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in a safe and supportive environment. Often, we uncover deeply rooted beliefs, ones that we’ve held onto for years, that can keep us feeling trapped in cycles of low mood or self-doubt.