When Your World Has Changed Too

Grieving a loss while caring for a child can feel deeply overwhelming—like walking a tightrope between your own pain and the need to stay emotionally available. Yet your healing matters not only for you but also for the child who looks to you for safety, comfort, and emotional guidance.

Supporting yourself through grief is not selfish — it’s essential. When you care for your own emotional health, you model healthy coping and create a steadier foundation from which you and your child can both heal.

Acknowledge Your Own Grief

Whether it's a parent, partner, friend, or pet you’ve lost, your grief is valid and deserves attention. Giving yourself permission to feel doesn’t diminish your caregiving role, it enhances it. Name your emotions: sadness, sorrow, confusion, or even relief. Sharing with a trusted friend, support group, or therapist can lighten an emotional load that’s too heavy to carry alone.

Find Moments of Self-Compassion

Grief has no timeline—some days might feel manageable, and others overwhelming. Choose small rituals that gently nurture your spirit:

• Light a candle or carry a keepsake to feel connected to the one you lost.

• Sit quietly with a cup of tea or go for a walk without any agenda.

• Allow yourself to cry, journal, breathe—or simply sit in peace.

These acts of self-compassion create space for healing, even amidst responsibility.

Let Your Child See You Grieve (Gently)

Children learn how to grieve by watching how others grieve. It’s okay—and often helpful—for them to see gentle, honest expressions of your sadness. You might say:

• “I’m feeling very sad today because I miss Grandma. It helps to remember her, and I love you, too.”

• “Sometimes I cry because it’s hard to lose someone we love—but it’s okay to cry.”

By modeling vulnerability, you give your child permission to feel and express their own grief.

Structure Your Days with Small Anchors

In grief, routines may be shattered. Establishing tiny anchors throughout your day can bring comfort:

• A shared bedtime story (perhaps The Terrible, Super Sad Day)

• A quiet moment together over breakfast or bedtime

• A short walk or drive where both of you stay present in the moment

These rituals don’t need to be grand—just steady and grounded in care.

Use Stories to Open Connection

You don’t have to be okay for your child to be okay—but holding space for shared grief can feel healing. Books like The Terrible, Super Sad Day offer a gentle, honest way to talk about loss. Reading together can spark a conversation and give both of you permission to feel.

Try asking:

• “Which part did you like best?”

• “Did any part feel like something you’ve felt?”

These moments of shared storytime can be a quiet balm.

Reach Out—You Don’t Have to Carry This Alone

Parenting through grief can feel isolating, but it doesn’t have to be. Seek support in whatever form works for you:

• Talk with friends or family who understand your grief

• Visit a therapist or counselor—even a few sessions can help

• Join a support group—peer connection can be profoundly comforting

Seeking care is not weakness—it’s strength. You’re showing your child how to find help when things get hard—and that you’re not alone either.

Embrace Imperfection (It’s Part of the Process)

There will be good days and hard days. Sometimes you’ll manage to keep your composure, and other times grief will emerge when you least expect it. That’s okay. You don’t need to have a perfect response or to fix everything. Your presence, even in struggle, tells your child they’re not alone.

A Loving Reminder

You are navigating one of life’s most profound challenges—the loss of someone you love, while staying present for the child who loves you. Your caregiving, even when sad, matters deeply.

Take a deep breath. You’re doing the work of love.

If You’d Like More Support...

The Terrible, Super Sad Day offers gentle honesty and emotional safety for both children and caregivers. It’s a tool you can lean on—whether to start a healing conversation, help a child process, or even for your own reflective reading.

You can purchase your copy of The Terrible, Super Sad Day here!